I have been dreading going to yoga on these summer days since March. I kept remembering the trouble breathing that came with the rise in humidity. I was so happy that by the end of January I had the breath mastered and no longer feared the frantic panic. I hadn’t taken a knee since late fall and no longer had times of panic where I’d want to leave the room, but by now I had figured out my success had alot to do with winter’s low humidity. I knew spring was a long way off, but the fear of returning to panic mode as the humidity increased lingered in the back of my mind. I worried even more about how I was going to do this in the dead of summer. Another great example of worrying about things that hadn’t happened yet and may never happen.
Here we are, mid-July, 90 degree temps, 70% humidity, and I haven’t had a problem yet. I took a knee one day in June, but it was due to extreme fatigue and not breath. Other than that, there wasn’t one day since last fall that I have fallen victim to the breath. Today, during this heat wave, I had an awesome class. I went through each pose easily, camel included, and the class was over before I had time to even think of having trouble.
How many times do we make up things about the future in our head and spend precious time agonizing over them, or use energy just by carrying them around in the back of our minds? Through yoga, I have learned to not do this. Yes, learned it. It is something that if practiced everyday in the studio, it comes to fruition outside of the studio. I have, in recent weeks, been able to deflect that kind of behavior from my mind, whereas a year ago spiritual weakness left me bereft to do this and I would succumb.
And so, as another day goes by, another personal victory is claimed, and…I have written.
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