For Easter, my husband gave me a beautiful lily. All last week I was enjoying each bell as it opened. I tended it carefully by taking out the pollen bulbs so I wouldn’t be allergic to it, and moving the curtains just right each morning so it would get enough light. But for three days now, when I positioned the curtains for the day, I noticed the new bells were bumpy and not smooth. They also seemed to be slower to open than the ones last week. I didn’t think anything of it, until this morning. As I moved the curtains aside I looked down into the pot and saw the brown, dried out dirt. I had forgotten to water it!
As careful as I was in taking care of my lily, still something essential to it’s growth was overlooked. In lilies, as in life, we must pay attention and not get distracted from taking care of the precious things we were given, so much so, that we miss an essential element for their growth. On the flip side, we have to be careful to not over-attend to things in our life so much so that we also miss providing the essential elements. Sometimes we are so ensconced in loving that we miss the real things our loved ones actually need and we are doing more harm than good.
The thought of the day in the Cape Cod Times was a disturbing one, and a concept I never entertained before. It said:
“Hatred is gained by good works as by evil.” ~ Niccolo Machiavelli
Our quests to “do good” and “help” can backfire, despite our best intentions. We get so blinded by being too loving and too caring, that sometimes a most important piece of care gets overlooked. We overprotect, overanalyze, and overwhelm and instead of love, we breed hatred.
Is there a place in your life you have over-attended and missed the obvious? Maybe it’s more space and freedom and less hand holding that is needed with a spouse, friend, or loved one? Or maybe it’s your own self that you been very careful to feed, exercise, and rest, but have lost sight of attending to your spirit and it’s causing you to not like or understand yourself right now.
In any case, take time to center yourself and focus on where your attentions have been of late. Is there thriving and growth or is there distress and puzzlement? If there is thriving and growth, give thanks. If there is distress and uncertainty, water it.
And so, as another day goes by, water, (or the lack of it), the essence of life, teaches once more, and….I have written.
Leave a Reply