In October I have been led through the values of challenges, integrity, power in action, and most recently, gratitude. The value for this first week in November is prayer. Melody Beattie started out by describing her first prayer experience as making a phone call expecting to get an answering machine and guess who picked up? Yes, it was a deep, knowing, ah..ha moment as it is for anyone attempting their first real, connecting prayer for the first time.
Talking easily to God, if you’ve followed this blog, is not a problem I have. It is, in fact, the opposite. I never stop talking to Him, which, apparently is frowned upon at this point in my life. (I feel like the E-Trade baby in the crib that got his laptop taken away) That’s why, for this month, God has put an order of protection on me. I’m only allowed to listen to Him. I consider it reverse prayer. I have heard many things I would not have heard if I had been nattering away at God, as I so often do. So far I’ve heard Him speak through books, people, music, yoga, a yoga cd, my drive to NY, a concert, and yes, even yesterday through Siri in the new iPhone. Now, after reading yesterday’s post, you might be scratching your head and thinking, “Where was “God” talking in that story?” I assure you He was.
You see, God knew how hard I’d been working on listening and refraining from doing. How hard I’ve been trusting to just listen, without asking, telling, or begging. Meeting Siri yesterday was great fun. God knew I needed a little laughter and distraction, so He introduced us. God does not always say serious things to us. He is present even in those funny, light moments that we think are apart from Him. Those moments are not apart from Him. They are from Him. Yesterday I drew on the value of gratitude and thanked Him for a positive day that contained a little humor.
Listening is proving to calm me and increase my faith and dependency on God. Today I was tempted to act on something I heard. Instead, I continued to listen. The desire to act, quickly slipped away and for the first time this year, I truly felt – I mean truly felt, with that deep-down knowing feeling that Melody mentioned, that if it’s not in the cards of what God wants for me, then I really don’t want it either.
And so, as another day goes by, I embark on another week of “reverse prayer”: aka “listening”, and…I have written.
* I wrote this post while having coffee at the gym, then came home and read this. There are no coincidences…
Inhale, and God approaches you. Hold the inhalation, and God remains with you. Exhale, and you approach God. Hold the exhalation, and surrender to God. ~Krishnamacharya
Saw this quote…thought of you. Miss you at yoga this week.