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September 4th, 2013 It was three years this summer that my mom passed away. I had a hard time with that. I spent my life talking to my mom almost everyday on the phone. I used to get excited to go over and have coffee with her. When I didn’t see her so much after I moved to the cape, I couldn’t wait to get home to sit with her again. We would sit for hours and just chat and, of course, gossip. Gossip about not only everyone in our family, but people on TV, too. We’d also sit and watch soap operas together and for almost forty years were so engrossed in the lives of our characters.
Today was the memorial service on Y&R for Katherine Chancellor. Jeanne Cooper, who played Katherine for 46 of her 86 years of living was an amazing woman both on and off the set. She was on the set right up until her passing. Her character was the glue that held all the other ones together. As each character went to the podium to reminisce, and the old footage of all those scenes over the last forty years played across the screen, I missed my mom more than ever today. Scenes of her life and mine over 58 years played through my mind. I especially missed that “excitement” that used to feel about going to NY to visit her.
Tonight I’m ending another Dorothea Benton Frank book, Shem Creek. The heroine has a sister and they share that same thing my mom and I used to share – that certain “excitement” about getting together for a gab fest. Tomorrow I’m going to NY for the weekend. My mom isn’t there anymore, but I found myself texting my sister and asking if she was going to be home Friday night. I told her I miss pizza & wine, but what I really meant was I missed sitting and chatting and gossiping with her, just as I used to do with my mom. I texted my husband to ask if he wanted to go over. He answered, “Sure!” I wrote back I told her yes – and added “I’m excited!”
Gradually, over the last three years, ever so slowly without my even knowing it, my sister slipped into that space in my life my mom used to occupy. Real change occurs in increments, day by day. Did you ever decide you were going to change something or do something consciously, only to find you don’t? It’s because real change is never decided. It doesn’t have a schedule or a plan. Real change occurs just like what’s happening outside our window tonight. It’s barely September, but summer has begun to slip. In three weeks it will be fall and we’ll think, where did summer go?
And so, as another day goes by, I’m thankful I have a sister like the heroine in my book, real change is unstoppable, it also keeps us alive and it’s usually for the better, and …I have written.
September 3rd, 2013 Today is the first day of school and it is no ordinary day, no matter how many times we encounter it. I have a very special video to share with you in honor of this day. Every mom everywhere should experience this video the first week of school. This first month of school is very hectic and emotionally charged no matter how old your children are. It moves fast. We shopped and prepared and now we meet buses, make food, drive, worry, drive some more, rework schedules, and drive some more. As we do these daily tasks, not only this week, but throughout the school year, the minutes tick by. While getting your three year old out of the car seat in the driving rain to pick up your five year old at school, you don’t stop and contemplate those minutes. You just do it and all you’re thinking of is how you can’t wait to get everyone home, warm and dry. These are our ordinary minutes of our ordinary days with our kids.
But…they are not so ordinary after all. These minutes of these days contain gifts. Gifts we are not aware of while unbuckling that car seat and balancing an umbrella and said three year old on one arm, while closing the car door.
And so, as another day goes by and a new school year begins, I give all you moms out there The Gift Of An Ordinary Day, by Katrina Kenison. Enjoy – with tissues – I wish you and your children the best school year ever! And..I have written.
September 2nd, 2013 Today is the fourth anniversary of my retirement. Since Labor Day 2009 my husband has always stayed to celebrate NEVER having to leave the Cape again and go back to NY for another school year. Now, make no mistake, I thoroughly enjoyed every student and every school year for over thirty-five years, but at the end of each summer my heart was ripped out when I had to leave my beloved beach. Every Labor Day my hubby and I left the beach and packed up my life and brought it back to NY. My profile pic is of that momentous day in 2009, the first year we didn’t have to do that.
Labor Day 2013 finds us with a warm, but overcast day, with intermittent showers. Not a day to spend on the beach like we have for the past three years. Yesterday we did manage to make a “sunset looking” drink and walk to the beach to set awhile. My hubby took this pic of me for posterity sake:
I like to think I haven’t changed much since my profile pic four years ago, but that would be wishful thinking. I did change. I had my heart scrapped clean and I learned and learned until I have a whole new heart and a whole new way of thinking. If I had to sum it up in one sentence, this is what I would say to you:
I got that quote out of the book I was reviewing yesterday, The Land of Mango Sunsets by Dorothea Benton Frank. Toady I’m coming to the end of the story and the impact of the end is just as forceful as the beginning that hit my heart yesterday.
And so, as another Labor Day goes by, it is definitely the end of another year of retirement, but so it is also the beginning of another year of retirement, I aim to make it the best yet, and …I have written.
September 1st, 2013 This summer I have been stuck on the fiction of Dorothea Benton Frank. Her books take place in the “Low Country”, the islands off the coast of South Carolina. My interest in her work was piqued when her novel Folly Beach popped up in my recommended reads. A few years ago I spent some time in Folly Beach on a movie set on Bowens Island. Hmmm. I thought it’d be fun to read a story taking place in a part of the country I’m familiar with, much in the way I enjoy stories that take place here on the Cape and the Islands. So I bought it and enjoyed it very much. I loved Benton’s style and quick wit so I continued to read her other books, all of which take place on the low country islands.
I’m probably on my fifth or sixth book by her. This morning I just finished Bulls Island and then downloaded The Land of Mango Sunsets. I haven’t reviewed every book of hers I read, but I did today. Even though I’m only a third of the way through this one, I have to say it already spoke to me enough to warrant a post. This is the first book I ever read where the heroine actually states in the prologue that she made huge mistakes, has been changed by them and then says:
Whoa. Ok. I’m on board. And I’ll be damned if she isn’t right. She tells my story within her own circumstance. In my late forties I was that person. I needed a major overhaul and through the love and patience of my dear husband and children, I was able to make that transition where the curtain was suddenly pulled back and I morphed into a different person. A better person.
This story made me remember days back when we first moved into this Capehouse, our children were grown and gone, and my husband and I were getting our lives back. Today I got to relive that time a little – not only through the book, but in our afternoon he and I just spent together. We made some beautiful “Mango Sunset” drinks and sat on the rocks by the ocean talking and connecting like days gone by. At the end of it all, I’m glad I opened myself up to change. I’m glad I attended to the spiritual part of me. I’m glad I didn’t fight an attitude adjustment. Now, twelve years later, my life is definitely better and richer for taking the same journey “Mellie” takes in the book.
And so, as another Labor Day weekend goes by, if you find yourself hanging in a hammock or beach chair and need a good read, check out The Land of Mango Sunsets by Dorothea Benton Frank, a perfect “day off” read, and…I have written.
Photo:
In the beach shack…my husband said I have yet another new job! Lol! (Check out the Mango Sunsets)
August 31st, 2013 We all know Tim Tebow. We know him not by his football abilities, but by his faith ability. As for football, well, we al know that story. He’s not super good. But yet, here he is, making headlines and being part of one of the most prestigious teams in the NFL. How is that possible? He’s not THAT good.
I’ll tell you my little story about Tim Tebow and you’ll see why he’s where he is, doing what he’s doing, albeit without super star, Tom Brady skills – yet there he is, standing shoulder to shoulder next to possibly the best quarterback that has ever graced the NFL. Since Tebow appeared on the NFL scene two years ago my attention was always piqued by his blatant faith. At first it seemed like his faith was going to show the world that by believing in Jesus Christ so fervently, you could achieve stardom. Nope. That clearly didn’t happen. That would be too easy for God – in fact, it would negate God’s purpose in trying to reach people by making “prayer” look like magic. So what does God do with Tim? Why, just the opposite. Puts Tim on national TV praying and advertising his faith and let’s him lose ball games, play badly, get bounced around from team to team – what gives? Uh…shouldn’t he be out to pasture by now? Any other player would be. No. Where does Tim end up? On the New England Patriots. What? Kind of the opposite of “out to pasture” don’t you think?
So, after my initial shock, I, along with everyone else, sat back to see where this is going. Tim’s time in Patriot land has not been that impressive so far. It looks like he’s been fighting to hold a spot on the roster through the pre-season cuts. Everyone is wondering if his performance this past Thursday night against the NY Giants was enough for Bill to keep him around. Again, it wasn’t stellar, but he DID pull the win out in the final minutes. Is it enough? Is he fighting to hang on?
I don’t know if it was enough – only the cuts made today will tell us that. What I do know is that Tim was NOT fighting to hold on. When asked yesterday if he thought his performance was enough to keep him on the team, it was his answer that resonated with me and prompted this post. He said his life belongs to his lord and savior Jesus Christ and he doesn’t worry about it. He’s confident his lord will place him exactly where he’s supposed to be. Then he said, “That allows me to live my life in complete peace.”
Wow. Isn’t that what we all seek? To live in complete peace? Hmmm…
And so, as another day goes by, God lives, moves and works in the most unlikely places, yet another message for me about just being still and letting God lead, letting grace be enough, and…I have written.
August 30th, 2013 It’s Fun Friday, the day of the blog hop I introduced you to last week. This week’s letter is “F” and as you can see, for me, “F” stands for only one thing – FUN!
Many years ago, throughout the nineties, I worked the rental counter and taught children’s skiing at Lapland Lake Cross Country Ski Center. I loved fitting people with skis and helping them have a wonderful experience on the trails. I loved teaching the children’s ski school because it was so much fun watching a five year old actually “get” the rhythm of cross country skiing.
In the 2000’s I worked the desk in the gym housed within our school at Broadalbin-Perth Central School. I loved talking to people as they checked in and helping solve whatever problem they were having that day. When a new person joined, it was such fun to train them and get them started on a fitness routine.
Today, in this present decade, was my third day working at my new job at Koko Fit Club. Yesterday I was still a bit nervous because I didn’t quite get the computer and I really wanted to know what I was doing in case I had to help out a member. There were a lot of routines to learn and after about five hours of learning, then working out, I came home exhausted. Uh oh. Was I going to be able to do this? Today was a different story. I arrived and immediately set to opening up and starting the computer. I spent time on the computer with my trainer Sarah and soon I was updating people’s keys, helping people with their form on the Smartrainers, and organizing our work area. It was so much fun greeting people and getting to know everyone’s name. In fact, today was so much fun, I feel confident enough to go solo next week.
Work can be fun and rewarding when you are engaged in something you love doing and have a passion for. My specialty is figuring out where a person is and devising a way to start from where they are and set them on a journey to personal success. Whether it be adults or children, whether it be skiing, learning to read, writing, or fitness training, nothing ignites my passion more than watching a person take that first step on their own.
And so, as another day goes by, my job at Koko Fit Club as a fit coach is my idea of fun and…I have written.
If you are a fellow blogger, consider “hopping on” below and let us know what “F” means to you!
August 29th, 2013 It was so nice to come home from work today and find my Boston daughter and her two friends here for the weekend. They have this “college reunion” weekend every year and this is the seventh year they are here. I just told them they were going for ten and in unison they yelled, “Stop!” – they will all be over thirty by then. I laughed. Such “kids”.
It’s a gray, cool, damp day here today on the cape. Not a beach day so I had my girls here in the house for the afternoon and evening. We watched a movie, sat cuddled up with our devices, enjoying a quiet, restful afternoon. They made some wonderful sangria, paired with a Brie and jelly bread along with homemade pita chips and avocado dip. We ordered a pizza and settled in for the Patriot – Giant game. So nice!
And so, as another day goes by, simple pleasures once again emphasize the best parts of life, and…I have written.
August 28th, 2013 When I retired four years ago I had a plan. I knew I didn’t want to work my first year. I wanted to do over each room of my house and begin writing. The house thing went well, but I didn’t write a word. By the second year I figured I’d find a tiny job and be on my way writing. No job in sight, but this blog was born. The third year I kept asking God when this job was going to appear, and worked on seven picture books. Finally in the fourth year the perfect job appeared and one book (look to your left) is published.
Today I began training at Koko Fit Club as a fit coach. When I joined close to a year ago, I knew this was the perfect place to work. I put in my application last November and just trusted God that when the time was right, it would work out. I didn’t hear from them until one day in June the manager at my club said, “Hey, do you still want to work here?” Yes, I did, very much, but I made all those plans to teach the Young Authors Workshops in Boston during July. I asked them to wait until the end of August. Last Friday she asked if I was ready. Yes, I am.
The book is done, I could use extra money for the wedding, and I need a break from writing. I need to do something else entirely. Winter is coming and this would be the perfect place to spend my time. I love helping inspire people to live healthier, happy lives. Here on the Cape our population is largely over 50. Koko Fit Club is the perfect fit for my age group. I love helping people who thought they could never work out at their age, or because they have diabetes or arthritis. Koko has programs for both. It’s a joy seeing seeing people fifteen and even twenty years older than me succeed at becoming fit. Then we have the thirty to fifty age group. These people are still working and have crazy schedules and think they have no time to work out. The Koko workout is done in forty five minutes. It’s all individualized, there’s no thinking, all your workouts and info are stored on a flash drive, and the club is open 24/7. This age group loves the ease and convenience – we have five clubs – you can go in any town you happen to be working in. Next comes the high school through thirty crowd. These young people love the technology. They love having the challenge of watching themselves become fitter as their program changes and they lift more weight as they grow stronger to play sports and run.
It’s a great place to work, but the best thing about getting this job is HOW I got it. I didn’t go out and pound the pavement. I didn’t use the want ads. I didn’t look for help wanted signs. I just left it up to God and completely trusted He would bring the perfect job across my radar at just the right time, and it would involve something I have a gift for. During my few years of waiting on God, I realized my gift was teaching, but I had to figure out how to do it outside the classroom. I did it all summer with my children’s writing workshops, but now school is starting. The next school vacation is a long way off, but here I am in another teaching position.
And so, as another day goes by, I can’t wait to go back tomorrow, better go get my shirt out of the dryer, say a prayer of thanks before bed, and…I have written.
August 27th, 2013 Today was my second day back to Bikram after my month-long hiatus. It was a rough comeback. My first class last week was flawless. Today not so much. It’s not surprising because the yoga always has IT’S way with you, never the other way around. I knew when I re-entered the hot room, there would be a little hell to pay. Well, seems there’s a lot of hell to pay.
When I felt the extreme heat while setting up my mat, I knew I had a decision to make. I was either going to set myself up for immediate failure by telling myself how hard this was going to be, or I was going to reframe my thinking into a new strategy.
My new strategy was to sit back and take a look at all I discovered about my practice in that hot room over the past three years. I knew a lot about how my body approaches certain places where trouble would inevitably strike and I had to set some boundaries for those situations. In my early years I’d push through, not take breaks, ride it out, etc. But I’d also go home completely depleted and useless the rest of the day if it was a morning class. Today I just decided I won’t do that anymore. I will stop. I will sit. I will keep myself from “pixeling out” (I see green pixels before I slither to the floor.) If I allow myself to get to that point the standing series is destroyed because I can no longer balance on one leg, and if I push it too far, the floor series will just be a bunch of groveling around on my knees. The point of the yoga will be lost and I should just lie still for the rest of the class.
Today, based on all I know about myself in that room, I decided I won’t do that. When I was wavering before pranayama breathing was over, I paid attention. I didn’t try to be a warrior. I kept myself calm until eagle. I did one set and had to stop and stand midway through the second set. Right there and then I decided I needed to maintain control for the remainder of the standing series. I did one set and sat one set for the remainder of the series. No pixeling. No falling. Just some calm sitting so I was able to stand up and resume the class without feeling dizzy.
This proved to be a good strategy because it saved my floor series. I was able to fully participate in the postures that were so critical to strengthening my back for fit club.
People have two mindsets in that room. Some people love to be pushed beyond being uncomfortable. They love extreme heat and long postures and revel in driving themselves through all kinds of pain. Other people approach the class with an air of gently doing each posture to the point where it is good and beneficial to the body. There is no drive to push themselves beyond physical limits and leave class totally drained and lifeless. I am of this second camp.
I have no desire to be the warrior. I work on my muscles very hard in fit club and need to come to yoga to gently stretch them in the heat. Some days my muscles love it and cooperate. Other days, like today, they aren’t having any of it. My wonderful instructor, Mark, told me before class to listen to my body. He was right. My body has a different message each time I attend class.
No one knows us better than we know ourselves, except God (and I’m not about to start telling Him what to do.) We need to take time to be still and listen to what we communicate to ourselves, both physically and mentally. And sometimes you have to make a rule and say, “I won’t do that.”
And so, as another day goes by, what learned in class today better prepares me for class on Thursday, and…I have written. Namaste.
August 26th, 2013 These past few years no one has pulled more stunts than Gaga – wait – stunts was the wrong word. Gaga doesn’t pull “stunts”. Whether you like her work or not, she’s a true artist and what she shocks us with on stage is always an interpretation of well-written music, behind which she has a message, delivered by a voice that is one of the best of the best. Now let’s talk Miley.
That performance last night was the perfect rendition of a stunt. It was not art. There was no well-written song, clearly there was only one message – a little girl rebelling against something, and it was delivered with a weak vocal. In fact, I can’t even bring myself to provide a link in my post for those of you who haven’t seen it. Just go on Facebook or YouTube – you can’t miss it. This is a picture of a little girl who is an A-List performer with an entourage and a circle of family and friends, some of which probably tried to talk her out of this train wreck, but she wouldn’t listen. And, if I had my guess, even after all the reviews, most of which are negative, she was sipping her morning coffee, defending it to death.
It saddens me that a girl who has so much going for her probably refuses to take the advice of some people who care about her very much. The only saving grace is that she is Miley and has already made it to the top and will remain there – well – just because she’s Miley. If a performer who is not quite C or B list, struggling to get noticed, went out there on their big chance and did that, they’d be finished before they even got started. Miley will be okay. She will learn a lot, eventually, and in her own time.
Everyone, not only performers, have to have their time to rebel and take the “this is MY work and I’ll do it as I please” road whether it’s a train wreck or not. It’s that spark of inner independence that starts us on a path of growth. We all pull “stunts”. Most of us just don’t do it on national TV. It’s “the morning after”, when the critics start cackling, and we realize what we’ve done, that sets the course for some self-examination. The journey to growth and change begins there. And so it will for Miley.
And so, as another day goes by, today they’ll be no picture because this is a G-rated blog, it will be interesting to see where Miley goes with this, and…I have written.
PS – Let us not lose sight of the fact that the little twit stole the show show right out from under Gaga – and she did it wearing a lot more clothes. Hmmm…maybe that’s why she’s smiling while sipping her morning coffee.
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