|
|
February 14th, 2012 Valentine’s Day is not just for lovers. It is for love, period. Every one of us has at least one person we love. Most of us have have as many as five people that are not mere acquaintances, or even close friends, but something more. I’m talking about those few people we can count on one hand who we love as God loves us. Those few that our love for them does not depend on how they act toward us, how they treat us, or whether or not they even respect us. Our love for these certain few just is and always will be. It doesn’t depend on anything they do or not do. It doesn’t even matter whether or not they make any effort to return our love. A few years ago bracelets with WWJD were all the rage. What would Jesus do? Jesus would love us like this. God loves us like this, without asking for us to do anything in return. We don’t have to go to church or do good works. There are no rules or requirements or even any way to earn God’s love. It’s just there. We do what Jesus would do and we live them like this.
Most of us have a few people we love like that. A kind of love that connects two people with a thin silver thread that absolutely cannot be broken, no matter what. A thread that both people hang onto through the hurricanes. A thread that leads people back to each other in spite of all the world does to separate them. A thread that they both hang onto in, under, and through it all. A thread that assures them they’ll both still be there after the storms have passed.
Below I’m sharing a favorite picture that I have shared in past blogs because it says it all. The fishhooks signify this kind of love. When a fishhook pierces the flesh of the fish the spikes prevent it from coming back out, no matter what. This is the kind of love we are meant to celebrate today. Love for a few people that has pierced the flesh of our hearts and due to the spikes, cannot be removed, no matter what because “Love never fails”.
My heart goes out to one girl today that had that kind of love for someone. Bobbi Christina had that kind of love for her mother. A piece of my heart breaks off for this young girl who now has to learn to live without the mother that meant everything to her. I know. I know because I have a handful of people that I love like this. People that I’ll love no matter what they do or do not do to me.
I believe this is the kind of love Valentine’s Day is meant to celebrate. Look to those you love like this today, make sure they know it, and have a very happy Valentine’s Day.
And so, as another day goes by, figuring out love is a life-long process, and celebrating it should be too, and….I have written.
February 13th, 2012 Nicki Minaj’s performance was beyond elaborate and expensive to put on. Yet it was tweeted as “people were outraged” by it. Adele – with just a black dress and a microphone resulted in six Grammys and everyone is enamored with her. Why is that?
I don’t think it’s a judgement of each artist’s style. I think it’s due to the current climate in our country. America is hurting right now. The economy and government are a mess. Job loss is the plight of many. People are seriously ill. Families lost loved ones. Significant others have left each other. Parents and children are estranged. There is a lot of loss. Pain is running rampant in a lot of lives. America needs a bandaid. Music empathizes and heals. Music understands. America, in general, seems to be seeking music that will stop the bleeding. Songs about sex, drugs, alcohol and, obviously, exorcism, delivered with extravagance and gimmick just don’t seem to be giving people what helps in these rough times. A black dress, a microphone, a big voice, and songs that were written from the heart are making America fall in love. Songs that say “I feel your pain”, and “I walked in your shoes”, and sung simply, with passion, seem to be what we crave in these uncertain days.
I, myself, gravitate there lately, too. 21 was an album I played often during my difficult times last year. It’s an album that understands real, heart wrenching, loss. I remember crying while walking on the beach as “Set Fire To The Rain” coursed through my soul. “Take It All” just knew my heart inside and out. “One and Only” was sung with such deep passion that resonated inside me I would find myself playing it at least two or three times. The album, to me, is a masterpiece that certainly deserved Album of the Year.
Adele was also impressive in her 60 minutes interview. I love how she said she doesn’t have to look like a skinny pop star and wear skimpy clothes to sell her records. Adele is a wonderful example for our young girls. She sends the message that it’s what you do in life, what your passion is and how you use it to help others, rather than having to look a certain way, to succeed. She said even if she were thin, she would still dress elegant. It’s about her songs. It’s about her voice. It’s about the passion with which she puts the two together that draws people in.
It was refreshing to see simplicity rule in in today’s music. So many times I go to a concert all excited to be taken away by someone’s voice and nine times out of ten I’m disappointed because the band, costumes, and stage antics completely drown out the performer’s voice and the passion is lost on me. Dave Grohl’s point was well-taken. It’s not about the stage production. You learn to play your guitar, you write your songs, and get out there and do your job. It’s about what’s in the heart and in the mind that counts. Though I am a huge fan of Lady Gaga, the only times I really enjoy her are when it’s just her, her piano, her music written from the heart and sung with passion, coupled with her fierce piano playing. Maybe, in music today, less really is more.
And so, as another day goes by, just a mic, a black dress, a big voice, and songs from the heart, sung with passion, certainly pack a wallop – who knew? And…I have written.
February 12th, 2012 Writing Pains is the name of another blog I keep under lock and key where I record my day to day angst at squeezing out words. Today I decided to post my writing pains here.
This morning I got up early and was still feeling the effects of Whiney Houston’s passing and on the other end of the spectrum, really looking forward to the Grammys tonight. I expended a huge amount of energy writing a music blog, only to have it go “poof” in mid-sentence. I was trying to publish a live link, pressed something I didn’t mean to press, and it was gone.
You would think I could just sit down and write it again. No. It’s not that simple. When I write, it’s a huge amount of energy expended from somewhere deep within. I get lost in the process, and am actually tired and sweating when I’m done. Trouble is, it’s now “out of me” and on the screen in front of me. If it disappears, like it did this morning, that particular piece is gone and I can’t get it back. I’m empty. I can’t reproduce it – on the same day anyway.
So today, out of respect for our lost artist, I just want take a moment to express my sadness and heartbreak over Whitney’s passing. I pray God bless her family, especially her daughter. As we approach the big show tonight, let’s put aside all the news gossip about the unfortunate things in her life and remember the good things she gave us. I don’t think there’s one among us who was not moved by the big “I” note in “I Will Always Love You”. Today, as we mourn our loss of this icon, and get ready to celebrate the accomplishments of our current artists, let’s let that note ring loud and true in the back of our minds. RIP Whitney Houston – and peace be with her family.
And so, as another day goes by, music really is a huge part of our lives, especially today, and….I have written.
February 11th, 2012 You know the old adage where the shoemaker’s children are the ones without shoes? I’m certainly a member of this school. Being a teacher for many years, the philosophy of learning that I firmly believed in was spiral teaching – reviewing everything learned for a few seconds each day and gradually adding new concepts to the queue. Throughout my thirty years in education it is the only method I’ve ever found to be tried and true. Spiral teaching results in learning that becomes part of a person. The concepts just don’t live fleetingly in the mind, but are actually assimilated into the person’s being and are drawn upon automatically, without thinking.
All that being said, here I sit, the classic example of the shoemaker. I was made aware of this in a passage I read this morning on simplicity, compassion, and patience. I also need to add surrender to this list. I spent a great deal of time last year exploring these concepts and “learning” them. Yet, this year, Valentine’s Day weekend, I’m no better off than I was last year on this very same weekend. All week, in the back of my mind, I’ve been asking myself, “How can that be?” Then, a piece of wisdom shared by Mark Nepo in an essay reminded me about spiral learning.
I went about my journey last year changing and growing and learning to be a better me, but every time I came upon a new piece of learning, I’d drop the old and rush headlong into trying to master something new. How did I ever expect hard things like patience and surrender to ever be automatic to me if I dropped them by the wayside on my quest for something new?
Today I’m reminded that patience and surrender must be worked on for a few minutes everyday and not dropped on the side of the road when I’m being enamored by new things. Within minutes, in another book, I came across this:
“The hardest part of surrendering is remembering to do it.” ~ Melody Beattie
That was a “duh” moment for me. Recently I got myself caught back in the sticky web of a relationship I had worked so hard last year to surrender. One small blip on the radar and there I am, mired down, feet and hands stuck in the web, wondering, “How did I ever end up back here?” Duh. The hardest part of surrendering is remembering to do it.
When I was in college some forty years ago I got a handmade gift from someone who is still today my very best friend and spiritual mentor. On the night that I surrendered my life to God, an old hymn was being sung. (As my other best friend would say, it was my “come to Jesus” moment- I love this friend for lightening up the heavy times in my life.) That night I was brought to my knees, with tears streaming down my face. My friend held my hand as we sang the hymn together. Her sister was an artist. A few weeks later, for my birthday, my friend presented me with the song lyrics, framed, and done in pen and ink, with the sides of the pages decorated in artwork. The name of the song was “I Surrender All”.
For the past thirty eight years that picture hung in every bedroom I ever slept in so I would not forget the huge moment that changed my life. In November of 2010 I repainted my current bedroom. I put away all my wall decor to redo the room. Somehow that picture never made it back onto the wall. I haven’t woken up to that message in over a year. And I wonder why I’m back in the sticky web. One more time – “duh”.
And so, as another day goes by, I know what I’m doing as soon as I get back home on Monday, and …I have written.
~ Mark Nepo – The Book of Awakening
(Haha – no pun intended, but once again, it’s fun that it’s there.)
February 10th, 2012 When you love someone who doesn’t understand love the road is a long, excruciatingly painful one. You think you have two choices – turn and walk away or press on with it. In reality, even though the other option exists, if you really do understand love, you only have one choice. In the words of Charlotte on Private Practice:
“You can’t give up on the things you love – not ever!”
That might seem like a trivial statement until you love someone that doesn’t understand love. One might say non-chalantly, “Oh I would never give up on those I love.” Until those you love give up on you. Then that statement is not so trivial anymore. It’s larger than life. You come to the realization that they don’t get it and you are fighting a losing battle. Now “wtf” do you do?
The answer is always the same. If you really love them you still only have one choice. You stay. You may stay far away. You may stay quiet. You may stay uninvolved. You may stay in prayer only. But you stay.
When God was planting the garden He had that seed for the famous tree in His pocket. He knew the havoc that tree was going to cause. The angel said to Him, “Why are you planting that tree? Wouldn’t it be easier to just not give them the choice?” I think God’s answer is the most profound statement I ever heard. When I first read it I almost stopped breathing. He answered:
“To take away the choice is to take away the love.”
If you never had the choice you would never know love. You would never know the option of walking away exists. Only by choosing to stay, no matter what, do you ever come to realize the magnanimity of love. The length and breath of it are enough to overcome the unfairness of it. The truth that “Love never fails” suddenly comes into focus.
And so, as another day goes by, the choice, for me, anyway, is clear, and…..I have written.
February 9th, 2012 Life really is like a butterfly. The harder you try to catch anything or do anything in life, the more elusive it becomes. Whereas if you turn your attention to the many areas that make up your life, giving each it’s due focus, that butterfly will come and land softly on your shoulder – and that which you were putting all your effort into will suddenly, gently work out or get done – surprisingly with a little less attention or effort.
Life is also a bell curve. It’s meant to be lived optimally at the very top of the curve – in balance, everything in moderation – relationships, food, work, play, etc. Take anything in your life and in your mind shift it first to one extreme of the curve, then the other, and imagine what would happen to you if that’s where you spent all your time and energy. That’s called getting very sick or depressed. Living life in the extremes puts too much pressure on certain parts of our mind, body and spirit, and eventually something has to give. The body gets physical ailments. The mind gets depressed and confused. The spirit begins to die.
I have a small company that I hang onto that sells vitamin supplements. (I don’t actually sell any, I just keep the distribution so I can get the high end product cheaper for myself because I’m not a great salesman) Anyway, when I had to start the company to obtain the distributorship, I had to name it. I thought and thought and then decided to come up with a name that says why I’m taking these supplements in the first place. I was taking them to balance out the nutrition I was missing by poor eating. Hence the name:
In Balance – Way To Live!
(at the time Macy’s – Way to shop was the big thing – lol!)
The butterfly quote below that I came across recently reminded me of my little business and my general philosophy of life. Take nothing to extremes. Everyday give your body some exercise and good food. (I’m writing this while cooling down on the treadmill – exercise – check!) Give your mind challenging work and problem solving. Give your spirit play, meditation, and quiet time. This reduces the slippage off the top of the curve and eases the constant chasing of the butterfly, allowing it to light on your shoulder gently, when you least expect it. Yes, I suppose, as stated in the quote below, that is the pathway to happiness.
And so, as another day goes by, I learn from the butterfly as I play out the simple story in my mind, and….I have written.
February 8th, 2012 Yesterday I said life was made up of trials, triumphs, and the mundane. The days of trials and triumphs are hit n’ miss. The mundane connects them. Today was one of those mundane days. You know – the rare day when you don’t move too fast, accomplish a lot, or even have anything peak your interest as you move through it.
This morning I went to the gym. Then my husband came home at noon and we went to Albany for his doctor appointment. We were both quiet on the ride. We had a 1 pm appointment and sat in a hot waiting room until 2:10 before we went in. I napped against the wall while waiting. The appointment was routine and took all of 15 minutes. Then we stopped for a very late lunch and played some Keno. On the way home I just stared out the window and actually didn’t say even a word. My husband said, “Awful quiet, dear.” I smiled and said, “Yes, isn’t it nice?” and then snuggled into my coat til we got home. He had to go to work and I sit here now, watching Ellen with cup of hot coffee in front of the fire.
A mundane day. I remember one of my thoughts as we rode home. I was thinking how peaceful and simple my life is. A few bumps in the road here and there, but nothing like people who are really sick or really in trouble are facing. Nothing to keep me up at night, anyway. That I give gratitude for. That, and a tranquil mundane day that didn’t require a lot of thinking or talking.
And so, as another day goes by, it’s nice to have a quiet, “thoughtless” one so room can be made in my mind for whatever tomorrow might bring, and…I have written.
February 7th, 2012 Sitting here watching Romney and Gingrich lambaste each other on the noontime news, assures me of two things. One, I could never be a public figure. I don’t have the skin for it. Tell me one bad thing about myself and poof! – my campaign would be over. This first thing tells me the second thing – I need to improve myself in a few areas.
Normally when I approach improving something about myself it is with a heavy heart. Having things to improve just points out how far away from the the image I have of myself being this person perfect in all areas of life. Knowing full well neither I or anyone else can ever achieve that state of perfection, just makes my heart heavier. So what am I striving for?
Today I came across something that changed my thinking on this matter. It said:
“I have to improve myself. I don’t say that because I’m flawed or unworthy, but because that is what life is all about. Life is about growth and development, not stagnation.”
The piece went on to compare us to stagnant water. Water is not meant to be stagnant. It ferments and cannot be used for anything. Water is meant to be mixed with new water, not stand on it’s own, with no new influence. And herein lies the reason why we cannot ever reach a state of perfection – because it really would be a state of stagnation.
Wow. That’s a load off my mind. The state of perfection I always sought doesn’t really exist because we are meant to stay in motion. Always meeting new people. Always trying new things. Always watching our world and examining new ideas. Always getting into trouble and then facing the challenges of getting out of it. These things are the essence of life. The thing to strive for is staying in their motion. There is no perfect state, no place over the rainbow where troubles melt like lemon drops. And…the best part of this little nugget of truth? It’s good. In fact, it’s pretty awesome.
We are meant to be on a constant path of self-improvement. Life is never going to be a bowl of cherries. And, that’s alright. Life is made up of trials and triumphs and mundane days. Moving through them, constantly growing and changing as a result of them, is how we avoid the stagnation of the mind, body and spirit.
Once again, changing my thinking changes my perspective. I need to improve myself not because “I’m flawed or unworthy, but because that is what life is all about.”
And so, as another day goes by, sometimes the simplest things are right in front of us, tripping us up, showing us a new path, and….I have written.
February 6th, 2012 Today was a day filled with the aftermath of the big game. While the Pats weren’t down ten at halftime, I did have the rest predicted right and those that made the big mistakes in the last fifteen seconds, lost – my team, the Patriots. I’m not going to focus on this most painful loss, but on the class of one almost member of the Super Squad.
Twenty four hours before getting to go to his first Super Bowl, Tiquan Underwood was cut from the Patriot team. He dreamed and worked for this moment his entire life, and although he was a seldom used player, going to the Super Bowl on the New England Patriot team was a dream beyond all dreams – regardless of whether or not he played in it. Within hours of his big moment he was cut from the team. Underwood took the huge disappointment with class, unlike Tom Brady’s wife, who, when taunted, threw the rest of the team under the bus by remarking, “My husband can’t throw the %#*# ball and catch it too!”. This woman needs to take some lessons in class and sportsmanship. When Underwood commented publicly on his unfortunate disappointment, he simply tweeted:
“It just makes me stronger. Tough times never last, but tough people do.”
I heard both of these incidents on the radio today while driving. I was having a weak moment of my own over a disappointment. Guess which individual lifted me up in my day right when I needed it?
We need to remember our thoughts, actions, and words reach far and wide and we never know who we are touching, especially in this world of social media. If you had the chance to influence someone today, what would you want them to come away with?
And so, as another day goes by, makes me think twice about my random tweets and posts, and ….I have written.
February 5th, 2012 This morning my husband and I went to the gym together. As we pulled out of the driveway he said, “Take your time. I’m going to walk for at least an hour.”
I replied, “That’s okay, I like to have coffee and by then I’ll have a topic to write about.”
He said,”Uh..it’s Super Bowl Sunday…do you really need a topic?”
I laughed. He’s right. The whole northeast is in party mode today and I’m joining them. Nothing better for me to do today than to make my predictions now. So folks, here’s how it’s goin’ down:
At halftime the Patriots will be down by ten. Third quarter they’ll go ahead by three. Rest of game it’s tit for tat until the final seconds. Whoever doesn’t make the big mistake in the last fifteen seconds is the winner!
And so, as another Super Bowl Sunday goes by, all I have left to say is:
“GO PATS!”, and I have written.
Hanging up my flag:
|
|
