I have a general philosophy about remodeling that has developed over 37 years of remodeling four homes. My tried and true principal is: do not remodel and try to change the way your family lives. Always look at how your family lives and moves throughout their day and remodel accordingly. If the kids drop their book bags and coats just inside the door, that would be the optimum place for hooks and storage lockers, not their bedrooms because you can cover their walls with hooks which will do no good if the book bags never make it there. If your husband uses the laundry room for his closet, that would be the place for hangers and a hamper, as opposed to the bedroom if his clothes never seen to find their way up the stairs.
Before I redo a room, I watch my husband and family’s use of the room and place storage and organization right at the tip of their fingers. They become neat and organized creatures and I didn’t have to retrain them to do it. Same thing with furniture placement. My husband will sit in whatever chair is directly facing the tv. If I place his chair at an angle to the tv, he won’t sit in it. I always found a cleaner, more organized home came from changing the home, not the people who live there.
The same goes for remodeling our physical and emotional landscape as well. We all have our own unique psyche. If you look up the meaning of the word psyche it says:
“that which is responsible for one’s thoughts and feelings; the seat of the faculty of reason; the immaterial part of a person; the actuating cause of an individual life; i.e. soul”
Our psyche is our own individual way of thinking and navigating through our days. For me, the keyword is a daily routine. First I get up, get ready, and go here. Then I come home and do this. Everyday, Monday through Friday, it needs to be the same for me. Weekends have to be separate. Weekends have to contain a “treat” in the sense I need them to be something I look forward to. To try to introduce any changes in my life that goes against that landscape will result in failure. Vowing to do seven days of yoga won’t last beyond the first or second week because it’s just not how my psyche operates. Same with my diet. Foregoing weekend treats of a few glasses of wine or a slice of pizza will just make me crazy and sabotage all the great healthy eating and water drinking I do all week. In the diet and food world, eliminating fun foods, things we crave, or a whole food group such as carbs, for me, is just a prescription for failure. It goes against my “grain”; my personal psyche. The same goes for exercise. I knew, this time last year, when I found myself with 15 extra pounds from a 3 month depression spent in a chair, that I had to add an extra afternoon exercise routine in addition to morning yoga. I tried a lot of things. Running didn’t work, because all my life I could never see the point of it, it hurt my knees, and it was not fun. Anything not fun does not fit into my psyche. Now, I don’t mean it has to be easy to fit into my daily routine, but it has to be challenging in an enjoyable way – such as the yoga is. Then I tried small machines. I was headed for shin splints. Clearly that was not a fun road. After 6 months, I found the perfect CD. A light cardio circuit that’s challenging and fun, only takes 20 minutes, and I can do it easily at home in my yoga room. It follows my “grain” and fits in my psyche perfectly.
If you are thinking of changing something about your life or your home, take time to watch and assess yourself. Figure out your landscape and the way you navigate it, then make changes according to how you operate. Sometimes deciding you’re going to get up 30 minutes earlier every morning to exercise sounds like an admirable change to make, but if you’re not a person to move very fast upon getting out of bed, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Pay attention to who you are and how you work. Figure out which way your “grain” goes. Then the remodeling you want to do will be a true challenge, one you enjoy, that will really accentuate change, instead of forcing you in a direction you are just not capable of going, setting yourself up for failure.
May first. Everything is growing and changing. You can, too.
And so, as another day goes by, I leave you with a wonderful poster my yoga teacher posted on Facebook today, and…I have written.
I feel like I am not even able to think to change myself. I am suffering from insomnia, though I’m going through some productive works by the time I’m not feeling like I should sleep or not being able to sleep. But I don’t know whether it’s good or really something bad. I want to lead a life maintaing a routine or following to-do list, but not being able to give a head start. I don’t how to do it. I’m really in need of an honest suggestion. I’m currently working for the site: http://www.foreclosureconnections.com/