I have a friend who put the most intelligent statement I have ever read on Facebook. She said, “When I was a kid social networking meant go outside and play!”
She posted that awhile ago, but her wise words have stuck with me ever since. This is not only true for children, but us grown-ups, too. Facebook is fine to say hello and connect with people you haven’t seen in years, but we really must be cognizant of how much of our relationships we conduct through Facebook, email, and texting. The absence of eye contact, body language, and voice tone leave gaping holes in conversations, in turn leaving gaping holes in our relationships. Things written are very often misinterpreted or taken completely out of context without the human element. We must be careful not to use social networking to solve difficulties we have with face to face contact. I, myself, always welcome a real “knock down, drag out, in person where, at the end, we can cry and hug, rather than an all out word war on the page where we’re just left feeling unsure and empty.
Reading the Facebook newsfeed often causes anxiety, even in adults (myself included). I cannot even imagine what it does to a fragile teen ego. We, as adults, must model for our children. We must “go outside and play”. If we need to make new friends, we must leave the house and connect with people in person. We must make sure we take time to visit friends and family and make that human connection and feel the feelings we share with our loved ones.
Having Facebook mobile has taught me a great deal, but the biggest thing it has taught me is that I shouldn’t have it. ( I feel another resolution coming on) If I’m out and about town I should be talking to and connecting with the people in the room with me, not checking and posting on Facebook every few minutes. If I’m home watching TV, I should be watching with those in the room with me. If I’m walking in a mall, I should be paying attention to where I’m going or I may end up in a fountain on the nightly news. I deleted my Facebook mobile app and will check my page on the computer when I get to it. I live in one of the most serene, idyllic places in the country, and I often let too much technology and social networking obliterate that which I should spend more time appreciating. If anybody has a reason to go play outside, it’s me, with an ocean at my front door.
I am, though, a firm believer in balance. Facebook, email, and texting have made relationships with loved ones closer, and even, in some cases, possible for me. Technology and social networking do have their place in my life, but I mean to be more conscious in 2011 of not letting them rob precious face to face interaction.
With Social Network up for movie of the year, I found an article in the Cape Cod Times yesterday by Mike Tempesta particularly interesting and like to share a part of it with you. The title was:
“Living Life in the Social Wasteland”.
I quote, “I rented The Social Network” for two reasons. From what I read, it is a superb movie, and watching movies is one of my passions. And I wanted to learn a bit more about the man responsible for one of the biggest wastes of time in the history of mankind.
What was so troubling about watching Mark Zuckerberg, the Facebook founder, for two hours was realizing he didn’t actually do anything while he was at Harvard. He didn’t jog around the Charles River. He did not shoot a basketball in the gym, swim in the Blodgett Pool, attend a Harvard-Yale football game in Soldier Field, strum the guitar at Harvard Square, write a poem, row crew (at least his nemesis, the Winklevoss twins, went out and did that).
According to the movie, he did not spend time in nature or devote any to helping the needy. What he did was create a place that is nothing like real life. It is a place where people now waste seemingly a third of their lives; instead of doing something, they talk about doing something on Facebook.”
Hmmmm….Shouldn’t we all go play outside for awhile?
And so, as another day goes by, a new resolution is born, and ….I have written.
Resolution Count:
1. Swallow the explosion and digest it.
2. Let time work and patience prevail.
3. Check myself in human mirrors.
4. Allow some “mess” and be okay with it.
5. Play outside more.
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