Yesterday I read an interesting blog posted on our Bikram Yoga Cape Cod Facebook page. It was entitled Move Your Mat. Anyone who practices yoga regularly, knows you acquire a favorite “spot” in the room. You also know the room is divided into “regions”. There’s the “hottest spot” not near any door or window. There’s the front row right smack up in front of the mirror. There’s the back row where no one can find you. Then there are numerous rows in between. There’s the window side. The door side. And finally, the middle, right in front of the teacher. The gist of the blog was encouraging yogis to vacate their favorite spot and take a trip around the room.
When I started practicing 18 months ago, I began in the far right hand corner in the last row. I stayed there for four months before people started talking about not getting attached to one spot. I was so busy just trying to stay alive back there, I didn’t realize I had a “spot”. But, what they were saying made sense. I moved up to the third row and hung out there for about a month. People were talking more and more about moving, so I moved up to the second row. The mirror was getting awfully close. I was kind of scared of the mirror. I liked being hidden with bodies in a jungle in front of me and focusing on the ceiling light in the top part of the mirror. But the movement was on and I eventually ended up in the front row. I got comfortable with the mirror and remained here for a good month. Then it was time to venture to the left side of the room. I went to the last row, left hand corner. Then the third row in the middle. Finally, trying to find a new spot every day or even week became tedious and was taking the fun out of coming. The last thing I wanted was for this to become “not fun” because I desperately needed it. It was saving my life. I couldn’t let anything make it “not fun” or not desirable to come to.
I went back to my front row in front of the mirror on the right hand side. There are three spots up there and any of them is fine with me. I prefer the wall just because I’ve learned to navigate within 6 inches of it, standing on the extreme left side of my mat so the three people behind me get a shot at the mirror. Now when I arrive at class, if my “spot” is available, I just go there. No tedious decision to make. Some days it isn’t and I find it fun to move a little, without the pressure of “having to”. I want nothing about going to yoga to become “pressure” of any kind. I can’t afford it to.
Now, after reading that blog post yesterday, I decided to think about my own trip around the room. No spot ever changed my practice. Even the new perspective from each spot I tried only mattered for the social time before class. Once the fingers go up under my chin and the first breath is taken, I begin the decent in my own private cylinder-like elevator. The instructions being given by the teacher echo in the background. My body obeys them easily because it’s heard them for close to 500 days. My mind goes to it’s place behind my open eyes and resumes the healing of the spirit. For 90 minutes I remind myself to practice gently. Breathe slow and normal. Sink slowly into each pose until my limit is reached, and if the humidity isn’t a problem, push past that point. The total mind, body and spirit connection is made and you know what? It doesn’t matter if I’m practicing hanging from the ceiling, my practice would be the same from any spot in the room. That’s what I learned on my trip around the room. That, and the fact that I can’t let choosing a different spot become a priority over what I do there everyday – or worse yet, destroy what I do there everyday.
And so, as another day goes by, once again, what seems to be good for everyone else, is not what’s good for me, and ….I have written.
Leave a Reply